Dear Loser,
My boss keeps telling me I need to be more of a "team player." I do my work. I hit my deadlines. I'm nice to people. What more does she want? — Confused in Accounting
Dear Confused,
"Team player" is one of those phrases that means nothing and everything simultaneously. When your boss says "be a team player," she could mean any of the following:
1. Do other people's work without being asked or compensated. This is the most common meaning. A "team player" picks up slack, covers shifts, and volunteers for committees. A "non-team-player" has boundaries, which is apparently a character flaw in corporate environments.
2. Agree more often. You might be expressing opinions. Opinions, in a team setting, are friction. Friction is bad. A team player nods. A team player says "great idea" when the idea is not great. A team player understands that consensus is more valued than correctness.
3. Attend more social events. The happy hour. The team lunch. The "optional" team-building offsite that is optional the way oxygen is optional. Not attending these events signals that you have a life outside of work, which is suspicious.
4. Nothing specific. Sometimes "be a team player" is feedback that has no actionable content. It's a vague sentiment deployed when your boss doesn't have concrete criticism but senses you're not sufficiently enthusiastic about your job. The correct response is to nod, say "I appreciate the feedback," and change nothing.
You're doing fine. Keep hitting your deadlines. Be polite. And the next time your boss says "team player," ask for a specific example of what she'd like to see. Watch her struggle to produce one. Enjoy the silence.
— The Loser